Parenting Alert: 20 Jobs to Ditch Before Your Child Hits Double Digits.

Prepare your child for independence so they don't end up living with you when they're 40!

children helping.

Most parents want their children to become independent. But so often we do too much for them because of expediency.

We have good intentions, life gets in the way, and doing a job yourself is easier. After all, this way, you can avoid an argument and ensure that the job is done well, right?

As a teenager told her father when he asked for help, “You’ve done pretty well without my help until now. Why do you suddenly want me to help now that I’m fourteen?”

Yikes!

But Ms 14-year-old has a point.

The key to independence-building in kids is to start young with small tasks and build from there.

Where to start?

In the spirit of building autonomy, here are twenty tasks that children could and should do for themselves by age ten.

20 jobs kids should do before they turn 10.

1. Get themselves up in the morning using an alarm.

2. Pack their own school bag each morning.

3. Make telephone calls about simple requests, such as asking if a store has an item in stock.

4. Look after the rubbish, including putting bins outside, emptying rubbish and recycling.

5. Prepare healthy snacks before, during and after school.

6. Make their own breakfast.

7. Cook one evening meal a week.

8. Walk to the shops on their own.

9. Tidy their own bedroom and make their bed.

10. Clean their part of the house, including tidying, sweeping and vacuuming.

11. Keep clothes and shoes clean including using a washing machine and an iron. At the very least, put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket.

12. Care for personal items such as toys, technology, sports and leisure equipment.

13. Take messages to school, including delivering excursion notes and other important messages to the front office.

14. Take responsibility for personal hygiene, such as brushing teeth, bathing, and keeping their face and hands clean.

15. Feed and look after pets on a regular basis.

16. Pack and unpack the family dishwasher or, alternatively, wash and dry the dishes by hand.

17. Prepare the weekly family chores roster.

18. Choose clothing each day within suitable limits.

19. Make their own in-store purchases and shop for some personal items.

20. Manage their own simple expenditures such as lunch money, entertainment expenses and personal items.

So far so good?

Okay, so how are you looking?

I suspect that this may vary for different children. Birth order, parenting strategies, and other factors play a role.

If ten is a fair way off for your children; I suggest you work toward it by creating junior versions of each task above. Adopt a similar approach if your child is neuro-diverse or has special challenges.

Your aim as a parent is to make yourself redundant at the earliest possible age.

The best place to start this process is at home. Learning to do things for themselves provides kids with agency and tremendous satisfaction.

More importantly, it prepares children for the autonomy needed to thrive when you are not present.

PS: Keep this list handy so you can refer to it often.

Weekly Wise Words from Parenting Toolbox

“Life is a balance.

Sometimes, you pour for others, and sometimes, you must fill your own cup.”

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